How are you guys today? I’m having a blah day, myself. It’s weird because in my younger years, I didn’t really have very many blah days. So they used to make me panic. I would think to myself, “What’s wrong with me?… Will I ever get out of this?… Is this the new me?… Why am I not happy?…Look at all that I have to be thankful for… Everyone else seems happy.” Well, thankfully I’m coping with my blah days a little bit better now. I’m just letting them happen. I’m not berating myself for not being happy and cheerful all the time. I think it’s because I have talked it through with family, friends and my counselor. Now I know I’M NOT ALONE! Yes, sometimes all I need to know is that I’M NOT THE ONLY ONE! But, since I have started to have these days, I have gained some tools that help me cope.
First, I remember that God made us with a range of emotions. That’s how he created us! So feeling blah is not bad, it just is. I also have to remind myself to just wait through this feeling, because tomorrow is a new day.
While I’m in the blah day, I try to do things that I know will help me cope. I go for a run, I go workout, I watch HGTV or the FOOD network (specifically Barefoot Contessa. Her life feels like a vacation), I call a close friend, and I watch Jimmy Fallen skits on YouTube. I’ll make myself get out of the house, I let the kids watch lots of TV, I get dressed (even if I’m not showered), I put some jewelry and lipstick on (I sound like my grandmother -ha!), and I’ll do something nice for someone else- like be kind to the Target checker, let someone go before me in traffic, and smile at a stranger.
Oh, and sometimes I just fake it. Yup, I said it. I just put a smile on my face and I act happy, because sometimes that pulls me out of the blah. It works, too. I used to work in a sales job, and it was some of the happiest days of my life. I think it was because I was choosing to be nice to people for my job.
I used to not tell anyone how I was feeling, because I was ashamed. But I’ve started to tell my husband so he can help me. One particular night was really funny. It was the end of summer, and we were on the couch watching TV. I looked over at him and said, “It’s going to be OK, right? The boys are just in a tough spot, and I’m just tired, right? This isn’t going to last forever, right?”. He looked at me and said with a warm smile, ” Yes, you’re going to be OK. You’re just having your summer melt down. The good thing is, it’s happening at the very end of the summer, and the boys are going back to school.” That made me laugh so hard- he had a name for it, my “summer melt down”. Ha!
While I was writing this post, I looked up at the TV to see Kelly Ripa and thought, “I don’t think she has blah days. She is just one of those people with a naturally cheerful disposition.” And then I thought, “Wait. This is what you guys probably think about me!”. Well, just so you know, I have blah days. Oh, and now I know (after having some experience), if my blah days aren’t going away, I go talk to someone.
Do you guys have blah days? What things do you do to help yourself?
I ran across this mural when I was in California this summer.
Picture Credit: Murals of La Jolla
I definitely make sure I exercise and eat right on my “blah” days. I don’t want to pollute my body with “blah” food and add to the already weird feelings. I find myself walking outside or just being outside more on these days. In fact today is one of those days because I’m having my 1st colonoscopy in the morning and I have so much anxiety brewing. I wrote a huge to do list to keep my mind occupied. First up, getting the house tidy and a roast in the crockpot!
Yes, I agree, eating healthy really does make a difference! I should add that to my list! I’m right there with you- if there is something impending, I definitely get the blahs. I need to remember to give these things more credit.
Living in the dreary weather of Seattle has shown me more blah days than I can count. Love this post!
Thank you for your comment.
Thank you SO much for sharing this! I actually had the EXACT same feelings yesterday…I went out for lunch with my little family, got my groceries for the week, and started crafting my daughters halloween costume that she’s beyond excited about! By days end, I did feel a little bit better, and it plants the seed that this week is going to steadily improve?you truly are such a pleasure to read, even “real life” stuff?
Warm Regards to You!
Thank you for your comment. You’re doing better than me! I couldn’t even make it to the grocery store yesterday, for some reason it’s one of my least favorite chores. Thank you for liking my “real life” posts!
I exercise. Run or box or do weights. Then I eat a grilled cheese. Works every time. 🙂
Yum, grilled cheese! I need to add that to my list!
For me it’s always on a Sunday. My husband and I call them “Sunday Blues.” What helps me is making plans. I’m comforted and cheered up when I look at my calendar, my week ahead, and make to-do lists. I may not do the things on my list but it always makes me feel better. I think it makes me feel in control and that comforts my type-A personality. You’re doing great, Cstyle! Keep up the great work!
I have “Sunday Blues” too. Thank you for your comment.
Life is multi textured…I think we need to be gentler with ourselves and not expect perfection and happiness at all times. There is beauty in the less-than-happy emotions too. All part of being human 🙂 Thank you for sharing your ideas for healthy things to do when in these spaces.
I agree. Thank you for your comment.
I tell myself “inch by inch, life’s a cinch…yard by yard, life is hard.” I try to just take it inch by inch and know the blahs will pass. I think of all the things I’m grateful for. I pray. I reach out to someone who might need me and look for ways to help someone else. I get my mind off ME (I can be exhausting sometimes). And like you, I put some lipstick on and a smile on my face…and just fake it till I make it! And at some point the blahs just kind offloat away and I can see clearly again.
Yes, getting my mind of ME helps me, too! I like the inch by inch saying, I’m going to add that to my list. Thank you for your comment!
what a great post – I agree that it’s so easy to see only happy perfection when we look at some people.
I really rely on “fake it” strategies on my blah days. I pretend that I am not feeling blah and just keep doing my normal things and that often works just fine – if the blah stays longer than a day, I start cutting myself some slack and telling my husband and best friend. My best friend always makes me laugh and that helps SO much.
As always, thank you for your comment Margo.
Love that you shared this! THANK YOU!
Thank you for your comment.
Carly, loved this post and love you! I have definitely had some blah days, especially since getting divorced and having to adjust to a very different life, but it has brought so many, many blessings, too! I love your suggestions for pulling out of a funk, and can really relate to the “fake it til you make it” technique and also doing nice things for others — both really do work! I know exercise is a great antidote as well, I just don’t always do it :). Your post hit home for me, because I know two families dealing with suicide in the last two weeks — I hate the thought that people were suffering and no one knew! (Not that your blah days, or mine, are anything like that, but it really emphasizes for me the importance of getting help if these feelings become overwhelming.
I hear so much courage, strength and compassion in your comment. Yes, I agree, so important to get help! I’m so thankful I did.
I was just thinking about you and wondering what you have been up too since I don’t get to see you at SLDS anymore. I appreciate and love your honesty! We all feel this way and some days more than others. Work and three boys schedules keep me busy but I plan a lunch with girlfriends at least once a week. It gives me something to look forward to and I love seeing my friends. Especially the ones that can be real and say (yep the outside looks great but on the inside I am a HOT mess)
I miss seeing you! I think I need to start planning a “keepin it real” girls lunch once a week, too. Great idea!
I do the same things you do plus, pet my dog and do something nice for my husband. Oddly, doing something for him spefically makes me feel good. He is a great dad, provider and I often neglect him 😉 So, when I’m feeling blah I make/or buy his favorite dinner or treat, buy him a pair of socks or a magazine. It came sometimes go unnoticed but that’s OK!
Also, I read this poem by Rumi….a lot! It is about welcoming ALL feelings.
The Guest House
This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
As an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.
This poem is amazing! I’m printing it out and putting it on my bulletin board. Thank you!
I think the universe is telling me something. I keep getting hints to address my issues with stress/ depression / anxiety. After reading this post yesterday I attended a business luncheon and the guest speaker’s topic was “Action for Happiness”. Coincidence? It is easy for me to bury my emotions although it never, ever works and usually results in a heated argument with my husband. I have made a promise to myself to not be hard on myself, not to assume responsibility for everything and to write down my feelings when I start to feel overwhelmed. Thanks for the post – I always enjoy visiting your blog!
Sam
Thanks so much for keeping it real Carly! I think it’s great when women share their true, authentic selves, even if it’s not all roses everyday. It’s what makes us human and makes us connect with each other. I’m hopeful it is something we will see more of (and I try to do the same on my blog) on social media instead of picking each other apart and saying mean, hurtful things from behind our computers. Thank you again for sharing.
I hope so, too! Thanks for your comment and your support.